An Eatmepoptart FAQ, Asked And Answered by milotruckdreams

We’re sure many of you have heard of milotruckdreams, the famed and somewhat mysterious (and hilarious) Instagram account that shitposts observations, and went viral with a nightlife post imploring clubs to start and close early for our well-being.

So it was a complete surprise that the person behind the account attended all our events last month in a ‘mystery shopper’ fashion, followed up by sending us an FAQ report, together with captioned pictures they took at our our parties.

Read on. We had a giggle and we’re sure you will too.

EATMEPOPTART - FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Based on three Eatmepoptart experiences (The Kids Are Alright, Never Lose That Feeling and Electric Feel)

by milotruckdreams

WHAT TO PEOPLE WEAR TO GO TO EATMEPOPTART EVENTS?

Really anything goes, you wear home clothes so dark also no one can really see. Everyone probably assumes everyone else’s t-shirt costs $90. But some archetypes for reference:

Office Man. I came straight from office still in my zara blue shirt, black pants and brown shoes. Maybe carry laptop in briefcase.
- Props to you for efficient timetabling. Personally, I would have brought an outfit change to work then change and leave my work clothes behind but that’s just me. But pls u really need to stop wearing ur uniqlo black office slacks with ur brown aldo oxfords.
It’s Party Time. Time to take out my Party Shirt (shirt with repeating print) Guy.
- Most angmos would opt for this, or SG guys who aren’t “afraid” to take “risks” in their “dressing”. No comment. Hawaiian-esque shirt man at nightlife event? Uneventful.
Finally I can wear my flimsy Shien top I bought few months ago girl.
- Usually this kind of event is where ppl take out all the stuff they can’t wear day to day. Boots la, all the xing gan clothing, taobao micro bag, etc. The gals I saw in this cat really quite tasteful, wear revealing top will wear long pants. Wear short skirt den don’t show cleavage. Can’t say the same for myself - if I got it and could flaunt it I’d be tits out ass out navel out 24/7.
Look at my Accessories ppl.
- Wear fluffy bucket hat la, wear tinted sunglasses on the dance floor la, wear cap backwards la, look at at my branded bag (carried by my date) la, you know what I mean. Is like the “feature wall” in a HDB interior design mockup. No comment.
Cannot get table all the barang barang take onto the dance floor big ass backpack swing here swing there person.
Everyone else.

IS IT ‘RABAK’? WHAT’S THE VIBE?

Diff venue diff vibe. Moonstone was chill. Ppl had dinner and drinks before the music gets going. When the music starts people start doing their little shoulder jiggle while sitting in front of their truffle fries. Then maybe transition to standing up dancing at the table? But is like your whole grp of friends circling ur table with half eaten food and dancing. Look a bit like some orientation grp activity - but it’s a good time.
Bigger venues with a proper dance floor like hard rock more akin to a club vibe? Which means 70% of ppl standing damn close kinda bopping up and down. And 30% of ppl at the sidelines looking at the 70%. All events were very wholesome. Even when one girl thew up she was doing it into a plastic bag while sitting down. Civil.

WHAT KIND OF MUSIC WILL BE PLAYING?

Depends on the theme. But is the got lyrics kind! I would say most songs you would know and is fun to dance to. Then if a song comes on you don’t know, most likely your friend would tap you and shout “YOU KNOW THIS SONG I DONT KNOW THIS SONG” then just like shuffle about and wait for the next song. Then if the next song u oso dont know then someone will say “THIS ONE I OSO DONT KNOW LOL” then u reply “LOL” rinse and repeat until Mr Brightside or Bohemian Raps come on.

IS POPTART STILL COOL?